Indie Artist Music Hustle

Your Son Said What About The Dog Food Dr. Simone? Married To Medicine

• Host and Creator: Blonde Intelligence (Ms. Roni) • Season 4 • Episode 79

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Welcome to this week's Blonde Intelligence. I am your host Ms. Roni and I always seek to give you exquisite cranial repertoire. One outrageous line can expose years of quiet patterns. We take a hard look at the Married to Medicine blowup—where a son threatens disrespect, a father stays hands-off, and a mother who pays the bills carries the emotional load—to explore how families slide from generosity into entitlement without noticing. Using clear, real-world examples, we trace the everyday choices that reward escalation, undermine a united front, and turn love into leverage.

We share why role splits—breadwinner versus caregiver—can work beautifully until unclear boundaries teach kids to game the system. You’ll hear how social learning explains repeated demands that get results, how family systems theory maps alliances that sideline a parent, and how gender expectations can pressure fathers away from direct leadership. Then we move from analysis to action: no more public disagreements, no answering over each other, and a strict rule that adult conversations don’t include kid commentary. We outline concrete steps to tie money to responsibility, from car access linked to work or grades to tuition support tied to conduct and progress, plus simple budget rules that remove drama from every ask.

Along the way, we talk timing and truth: when “I just tell it like it is” actually breaks trust, and how to deliver hard facts without blowing up relationships. If you’re a parent of sons, a partner trying to rebuild alignment, or anyone who’s felt outnumbered in your own home, this conversation offers a blueprint to replace chaos with clarity and respect. Hit follow, share with a friend who needs backup, and drop a review telling us the one boundary you’re resetting this week.

@BlondeIntelligence #MarriedToMedicine 

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SPEAKER_00:

Hi girl, let me tell you about this podcast. Girl, everybody has a podcast these days. But this one interviews new and interesting indie artists. It's called Indie Artist Music Hustle with Blonde Intelligence. Really? Where can I find it? It's on all podcasting platforms, streams live on social media and on rpentradio.com. What you say it was called again? It's called Indie Artist Music Hustle with Blonde Intelligence. Girl, I'm gonna have to check her out. Give it a check, girl.

SPEAKER_01:

Welcome to this week's Blonde Intelligence. I'm your host, Miss Ronnie, and I always seek to give you exquisite cranial repertoire. This week I am going to talk a little bit about basically what everybody else has been talking about in the reality TV world with Married to Medicine. Um I saw snippets of the scene and of the Zoom and of other commentators, and I had a conversation with my cousin because she is the mother of a son, and I have two sons. So I guess we were trying to put ourselves in her place, but I guess to some extent, even though you have similarities, there may be more differences, I would say. The first thing that kind of stood out to me was Dr. Heavenly, when she said I wasn't there, but I knew it was worse than what we saw on TV or whatever, and basically saying that she had some things that she wanted to say, and every time she tells the truth that it gets her into trouble. And I kind of feel like if you already know beforehand, before it comes out your mouth, and that it could possibly mess up some of your friendships by you saying this, you can rephrase or choose not to speak on it as of yet. I just feel like that that's an excuse that you use. Well, you know I tell the truth, yeah, but I don't know about if it was your place to tell the truth at that time and who you told your truth to. But I'm just thinking about I guess the family dynamic of it all. And a lot of people are saying that Cecil is a kept man, that he had he don't work, and da da da. But I also look at the fact that when you're in a two-parent household and one have a more demanding job than the other, you need one of those parents to be the stability. The one that can go with the school call, or if the child gets sick, or if uh they need to be picked up early, or y stay up late to help do homework or projects. So I feel like and it's just my opinion, that Cecil was that, and that as the boys got bigger, that maybe he was growing up with them, I would say. I don't know anything about that. I watched Marit to Medicine, but as I got more into my professional career, I didn't have as much time to watch reality TV like that, and I have basically gotten to where I don't watch TV at all. But they also talked about the behavior of the son and the behavior of the father and what Simone has allowed. The behavior of the son, the main comment that everybody is talking about that I have not seen to be addressed yet was I hope when she was going to get her iPad to show the budget, I hope that what you're about to say to me is not gonna make me mad or something to that effect and give your food to the dogs. And that's when everybody who's a mother of sons started having their opinion. And I can't help if he's 22, 12, 42, or whatever. She said to him, It might. And everybody else is like, what the hell you say? You you want to repeat that and say that again? You're gonna do what? See, her saying that it it might be. Maybe that's her way of keeping him calm. But in my world, I want you to go ahead and get froggy. Let's get it all out now. Jump around, jump up, jump up, get down. I want you to do it. I want you to do it. Because I don't know who you think you're talking to, especially after she just told him last year you spent sixty thousand dollars on X, Y, Z credit card. And people were saying some people don't make sixty thousand dollars a year. True. And in some states, sixty thousand dollars a year is minimum wage. So you cannot count other people's money and what costs what, and it was it just him or was it his living expenses? And I understand that how if you have it, sometimes parents uh uh do for you, such as buying cars while you're in high school, so you can help get your little brothers and sisters to where they need to go. And you may not necessarily have to have a job if your parents can afford it, because you're helping with the responsibility of the parent. So that's the reason why I said that you have to have one of the the parents that can be reliable and stable. As I said earlier with the behavior of the the father, I feel like that he kind of like grew up with the kids. And he has like an easy going kind of like persona or whatever, where they probably could go to him and talk about anything. But what he is not understanding is and maybe I'm wrong, I could be wrong. Well, me and my husband was together and the kids wanted to come and talk about something. And I'm like, No, or no, you can't do this. I wish you would in my face be like, Oh yes, you can. You in trouble, buddy. You in trouble, and you in trouble too. Who told you to open your mouth? If you got something to say, we can discuss that and come to a consensus and come back. Hey, we talked about it and we decided this, this, this, this, this. But if you disagree with me in front of the kids, hold it. And we go, hey, can we take the time out? Let's go talk for a minute. I don't like the way that he handled that, but it's not my marriage. But then she did say that she always felt like it was three against one. Baby, it would never be three against one with me. Because you know what? I get my happy ass up and go. And now it can be three against zero. How you like that? Have none. So then it's people talked about what Simone allowed, that by him saying that he would give her dog to her food to the dogs, that maybe he has been having temper tantrum-like behavior throughout the whole time. And I can't understand why this young man is tired of looking at his Jeep with no job. I also saw that, and she can do what she wants, that she bought him a Tesla. Cool, because then you decide what you want, how much was the trade in, da-da-da. Really, how much, how much, how much, you know. So I guess when you look at the the books or whatever, we don't know. But she's saying that she's not fully ready to retire, being financially comfortable where she wants to be, and this young man wants to go to law school. And I just tell you that if you go to law school and you have an issue with the judge or your client or your co-worker or uh anything, a supervisor, you know, you can't fall out and tell me I'm gonna give you food to the dogs, or I just have my mama to pay for it. So that brings me to the comments that people were saying about this young man and how he's gonna be as a man. Because I think she took the kids and their girlfriends on a trip to Jamaica, which is cool. But I think about that that um song by Janet Jackson, Well, How You Done For Me Lately, and even Bills, Bills, Bills uh with Destiny Child, when she said, You're buying me gifts using my credit card. You're not buying it for me. You just showing off. And I feel like, how is he gonna support a girlfriend with no job? It'd be like his family got money, they give him blah blah blah blah blah. That right there is a disaster right there, because that means that she would be comfortable living off your ass too. Then that moves me to the Zoom meeting, and we talked about that and how disrespectful it was that the son kept answering for the father while the mother was talking to him. See, they both should have had enough sense to tell him the eggs left because that talk that they should have had when they disagreed the first time to go behind closed closed doors to come to a consensus, they decided to do this on the Zoom with him there. First of all, he needs to learn when grown people are talking to shut his mouth. Now I am saying that because that means in class or in in in during lecture time, even during labs, you're gonna talk more than the instructor. So you're gonna be lacking in some things because you don't know how to close your mouth. And then the dad as a man, not just the daddy, but as a man allowing it. It was no hold up, son, let me speak for myself. Right now, you out of place. This is not for you. Because why, he's gonna probably have a temper tantrum on your ass too. Makes me wonder. So I did do some looking. The son's entitlement likely developed from repeating modeling, reinforcement, and family role dynamics. From early childhood, they appear to have been socialized to expect the mother to provide financially and to tolerate their demands. The mother acted as the primary breadwinner and resource provider, while the father assumed the caregiving household role and may have failed to set consistent boundaries or consequences. Social learning theory predicts children imitate observed behavior and internalize expectations when that behavior is rewarded. If the family routinely gave in to the son's requests, such as new cars and funding professional school, that created operant reinforcement. Their demands produced desired outcomes. So entitlement was strengthened by giving in to his demands. And I have a cousin like that. She'll go to her mama, ask her mama for anything. I'm gonna be fussing and cussing, and she don't even care. And men do that too when they one of them type of men that always asking a woman for something. She can fuss, fuss, fuss, fuss, fuss, fuss, fuss. And no matter what, he'll sit there and listen to it, or she'll my cousin listen to it because she knows in the end she's gonna get what she wants. Family systems theory adds that unclear role boundaries, for example, a mother performing both provided and disciplinary roles while the father abdicates authority, can produce coalition patterns where children form alliances with one parent. And you see that with her saying that she always feels like it's three against one. This undermines the other parents' authority. The son's verbal threat about the mother's food suggests aggressive boundary testing and use of emotional coercion to regain control. So no matter how upset she got, he rationalized it away because it's really about him. Now, regarding the father, jealousy is a plausible psychological explanation, but not the only one. He may experience role incongruence and threaten masculinity. Traditional gender norms often tie male identities to being the financial provider. So a long-term role reversal, such as the wife being the breadwinner and he the stay-at-home parent, can produce feelings of inadequacy, resentment, or threatened social status. These feelings may translate into siding with the sons to preserve familial alliance to avoid confronting his own discomfort. And when I read this, I was like, I never did think about it from that perspective because he does seem like he's non-confrontational. So if he is unhappy about something, maybe he is exhibiting it in that way. Possibly. I'm not saying that this is so. Alternatively, he might be avoidant of conflict, preferring to appease the sons rather than to support the mother, or he might unconsciously maintain control by aligning with them to keep the household structure unchanged. So that kind of puts it where maybe Heavenly shouldn't have spoken so hastily, because she don't know that the dynamics of what Cecil may be going through, because it may not be all peaches and cream for him to be, as they say, quote unquote, being a kept man. It says psychological indications present in this scenario, which is this the scene that we saw. Simone said that her kids were entitled because she was like, What's gonna happen if I'm dead? Well, if you're dead, then they're gonna get your insurance money. So I guess bad to say it may be a win-win for each one of them if you're gonna give in, no matter what. But it's a psychological indications present in this in this scenario. Entitlement and low frustration tolerance in the sons, expecting the mother to finance major expenses and reacting with threats when challenged indicate a pattern of externalized responsibility and poor delayed gratification skills. Poor boundary, setting and parental inconsistency, the father's side and with the sons, and the lack of support for the mother indicate weak parental alliance and inconsistent enforcement of household rules, role confusion and identity strained on the father, long-term occupation of non-traditional role for men combined with the wife's financial dominance can produce shame, resentment, or passive aggressive behavior rather than overt aggression. So instead of him, if he feels away saying, I feel this, he's oh, uh, she don't want to do this for the kids. I'm with you boys. And that's his way of getting back. Possible. Emotional coercion and relational aggression. The son's food thread is an example of using humiliation or deprivation as leverage to influence the mother's behavior. Coalition building. The family dynamic appears to include alliances that protect certain members' behaviors, the sons and the fathers, and marginalize the mother's authority. Interventions suggest brief family therapy focusing on boundary redefinition, re-establishing parental coalition, and consistent consequences, and individual counseling for the father to process role-related emotions, behavioral approaches, clear expectations, graduated privileges tied to responsibilities, such as if you get a job, then we'll get you a car when you can pay the note. Or you come home and stay, and I don't pay for a condo while you go to law school. So it has to be tied to responsibility. All these things can help reduce entitlement. These recommendations are consistent with the empirical family systems and social learning approaches. And my sources was A Bandora for the Social Learning Theory. Yes, I had to learn that a lot. And R. Connell, the book Masculinities, the second edition from the University of California Press. So that's all I have for this week. And I think that a lot of parents can relate to at least portions of what happened in that episode or that scene. So leave your comments. That's all I have for you this week. Bye.

SPEAKER_00:

Hey girl, let me tell you about this podcast. Girl, everybody has a podcast these days. But this one interviews new and interesting indie artists. It's called Indie Artist Music Hustle with Blonde Intelligence. Really? Where can I find it? It's on all podcasting platforms, streams live on social media and on rpentradio.com. What'd you say it was called again? It's called Indie Artist Music Hustle with Blonde Intelligence. Girl, I'm gonna have to check her out. Give it a check, girl.